FB Complaints and Compliments

So, is bookface the downfall of our nation? It has gone beyond just the fact that my boss might see me tagged doing a kegg stand at a college frat party I don't even remember attending. It is to the point now facebook seriously affects the way I see myself. It is doing some major self esteem damage. Not only are there a million unflattering photos of me, there are a million unflattering photos of me by myself being single and not doing anything spectacular. Seriously, the most exciting thing I did this entire week was go to a Passion party. (Don't Ask). Everyone has photos from their wedding with their incredibly hot spouse and beautiful bridesmaids who look amazing in short strapless dresses. They don't look ridiculous at all. Is that even fair? Then there are people with kids. Every photo is their child doing something cute. Congratulations you have the cutest kid in the world. They are going to grow up a facebook child. It is kind of like those celebrity children that can't lead normal lives because people are always taking pictures of them and commenting on how often they pooped and if they ate their vegetables. I mean do you want your child to turn out like Kathy Lee Gifford's poor son Cody? Do you? She talked about him so much she got fire from Regis and Kathy Lee. How do you replace someone who's name is in the title of the show. This isn't Lassie people!
STOP- Facebook does have an upside. Do you remember that girl or guy you hated from high school or college? Fear not they may have gained a couple hundred pounds. Better yet, they may have braces, glasses, or terrible acne breakouts in their thirties. They may cheer for the wrong football team. It gives you reason to hate them more. Maybe they married a short bald guy with a snaggle tooth. Or maybe that was you? Either way some people got their come up ins. The question I must ask myself "Am I one of them? Am I getting what I deserve? Maybe I do deserve to be jobless, homeless, careless, and spouseless? Or, maybe I am just down on my luck and facebook isn't magic karma?"
Karma or no karma facebook has many faces. It is up to each person to choose to look on the bright side and see the glass half full of something great like Pink Catawba wine or see it half empty. So which glass is your facebook glass?
I think today I will choose the empty glass. It is not so bad because I am not thirsty anyway since I just brushed my teeth.